For Real
God can be found when I'm celebrating, suffering, or transitioning. He is found as I engage with the character of Christ whose life and Spirit direct me toward the Father. Know that the Lord, is God and He is good.
I'm not where I want to be, but I thank you that I am not where I was. Oh, Jesus, You defeated sin and death. You rose victorious. One of the many beautiful things about this is that you don't want or need me to strive You want me as I am, wholly broken and wholly yours. You love me and want me in Your presence, sin and all. You accept my flaws and cover them in Your grace. Your mercy flows deep and wide, flooding the parts of my being that are sinful and showcase the past. You look beyond my doing, into my being.
Oh, Jesus, Your timing is funny. As I tentatively dip my foot into the gray space that is between where I am now and where You long for me to be, I feel hesitant, uncomfortable, and scared. This step would mean letting go of the control that I incorrectly believe is mind. It means trusting You and Your plan; that You have goodness intended for me. You love me. It amazes me, God, that You choose to bless me. You delight in me despite my failures. I love that this discussion of failure, transition, gray space, and other things were discussed in therapy today and now I am reading about it.
God, please change my heart and mindset so that I more focused on You, and less on achievement, success, and obedience to rules and constructs that I have made in my mind.
Lord, You know how Ed gets me down. You know that I feel frustrated, upset, tired, scared, sad. You see my emotions, my reactions, the temptations I face, and how I handle them. You see me everyday struggle with food, exercise, choices, and thoughts. I know that You love and You care. You don't leave me alone, even if it feels insurmountable at times. You are still by my side and You love me as I am.
God, right now, as I am triggered by weight, images of others, my body size and internal feelings, temptations to restrict, yet a desire to recover and eat, and a myriad of other things, please come close, remind me of who I am in You. That none of this matters in the long term. Remind me that I have people here to help me. Remind me to be grateful for the therapists and support team members that You have so graciously given me; You knew that I would need them. Encourage me on my journey and give me strength. Help me to remember the "small" successes of the day, and to have pride in how I have been doing. Remind me of "What would CFD do?"
You alone, O Lord, are the source of my salvation, my safety, and hope. Without You, I am nothing.
I'm not where I want to be, but I thank you that I am not where I was. Oh, Jesus, You defeated sin and death. You rose victorious. One of the many beautiful things about this is that you don't want or need me to strive You want me as I am, wholly broken and wholly yours. You love me and want me in Your presence, sin and all. You accept my flaws and cover them in Your grace. Your mercy flows deep and wide, flooding the parts of my being that are sinful and showcase the past. You look beyond my doing, into my being.
Oh, Jesus, Your timing is funny. As I tentatively dip my foot into the gray space that is between where I am now and where You long for me to be, I feel hesitant, uncomfortable, and scared. This step would mean letting go of the control that I incorrectly believe is mind. It means trusting You and Your plan; that You have goodness intended for me. You love me. It amazes me, God, that You choose to bless me. You delight in me despite my failures. I love that this discussion of failure, transition, gray space, and other things were discussed in therapy today and now I am reading about it.
God, please change my heart and mindset so that I more focused on You, and less on achievement, success, and obedience to rules and constructs that I have made in my mind.
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| Image created through the YouVersion Bible App. Verse interpretation is my own. |
God, right now, as I am triggered by weight, images of others, my body size and internal feelings, temptations to restrict, yet a desire to recover and eat, and a myriad of other things, please come close, remind me of who I am in You. That none of this matters in the long term. Remind me that I have people here to help me. Remind me to be grateful for the therapists and support team members that You have so graciously given me; You knew that I would need them. Encourage me on my journey and give me strength. Help me to remember the "small" successes of the day, and to have pride in how I have been doing. Remind me of "What would CFD do?"
You alone, O Lord, are the source of my salvation, my safety, and hope. Without You, I am nothing.
I started this blog as a memoir to share some of my life stories with you. My goal is that these encourage and educate you on how to live a more joyful, healthier, full life; one of hope.
I write about my fascination with whole foods, my love of Jesus, my struggles, my childhood stories, my passion for education, and my devotion to creating a healthy life (body, mind, and spirit) for every person in the world.
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